Today

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Today
Not tomorrow
I want to love you
Because I don’t have another day
To hold you so close we are meshed
In spirit and soul but not in body
That you may remember me
Cherish my memories for every but that one togetherness

A week ago
I wrote you a story
Of how I pictured us in my dreams
Graying hairs and wrinkled skin
And very much in love still
That story I have hidden
For you to read only when I am away
Gone, for forever and after

Yesterday
When I was staring at you
You remember?
I was not memorising your face
Because after the morrow there’ll be no remembrance
Of what could have been that was not
I was savouring your plain looks
Wondering how you are capable of such affection

Last month
I saw a wedding dress at a bridal store window display
I went in, tried it on as my heartbeat fastened
Not with trepidation at the impossibility of our future
Just joy that you’ll get to see me yet in one
Oh my delight! In taking a picture
It has been attached to our fake story
Whilst the real one ends with a shocking period

Two nights ago
I made you promise to demand happiness
You thought you’d have me always
You laughed, I winced
Didn’t you see my swollen eyes?
Did our love consume you so?
Or was there someone else?
I won’t know and happily so

To soon be gone
When you’ve had true love
They say it is good enough
I say I don’t know
I have no one to compare notes with
No choice to make
You swore to find joy again, dear one
So I await tomorrow while I savour today.

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